To Reach the Sun
by teawithmugi
Summary: A flower's greatest joy is to bask in the light and warmth of the sun, to bloom in honor of its beauty. Its greatest sorrow is knowing that the sun can never see its own splendor the way a flower can.


Tsubomi gently brushed Itsuki's hair, careful not to hurt her tangled strands. It was just past her shoulder now, beautiful and soft to the touch, but still a bit messy; Itsuki had not yet grown very used to her long hair, so she often asked Tsubomi for help with it. She was always apologetic when doing so, never wanting to be a burden, but to Tsubomi she could never be: in fact, Tsubomi loved to brush Itsuki's hair, to play with it, to feel it between her fingers, to see it grow longer with each day, each week, to bask in Itsuki's smile as she looked into the mirror and loved what she saw. She was truly grateful that Itsuki shared those moments with her.

Erika's bedroom was just the perfect place to do it, too. She had so many mirrors, so many different kinds of combs and brushes (Tsubomi couldn't actually tell the difference between most of them, though), and, most importantly, so many ribbons, so many hair ties of all different colors, so many clasps adorned with tiny flowers. There had to be a sunflower clasp amidst them, but to her frustration, Tsubomi couldn't find any. When Erika showed them all her accessories just before she left, she didn't seem to concerned with actually sorting them out, so she just threw them all on the floor. They were now all scattered around, making rainbows on the floor.

And in the middle of the rainbows was the beautiful sun, shining proudly, softly, marvellously. Tsubomi could see Itsuki's face reflected in the mirror in front of her, and it was a challenge to pay attention to the hair she brushed when she could instead look upon her gentle eyes, her tiny, delicate nose, and the serene smile free of any worries on her lips…

"Ow," she whined as Tsubomi unknotted some of her hair, perhaps a bit less delicately than she had hoped.

"Ah, I'm sorry!" she said, letting go. "I tried to be gentle, but-"

"It's alright, it just surprised me. Please keep going. My hair always looks pretty when you're the one taking care of it."

Tsubomi thought her hair looked perfect no matter what, but she'd never deny a compliment from Itsuki. She kept going, more carefully now. Her hair was long enough for pigtails now, tiny ones, but she was certain that they would look pretty anyways. Or maybe she could braid her hair into a ponytail. Itsuki always said she wanted to braid her hair… Tsubomi had never been very deft at it, her braids were always uneven and came undone at the slightest touch. She always asked Erika for help with those.

But for Itsuki, she was willing to try anything. The thought of Erika being the one to do it made her feel a sting of jealousy. _She is my sun,_ she thought for a second before realizing just how silly the very notion was. Not one person could possibly claim the sun.

Yet she wished that all the same. To reach out for the sun, to hold her in her arms, to cradle her as she slept, to have her warmth all for herself… Maybe that was too much for a single flower. Could the sun even love a flower the way a flower loves its light? There were countless flowers, and only one sun. Thoughts like those almost made her hopes wither. They almost made her think that she should consider herself lucky just for the privilege of being so close to the sun, that if she tried anything more, she would just be set aflame.

But only almost. Whenever Itsuki turned to her, their faces so close they could feel each other's breath, and she smiled… Whenever that happened, sunfire burned all her fears away, leaving nothing behind but a proud blossom.

"I really appreciate this, you know," Itsuki was suddenly whispering, even though they were alone in Erika's bedroom. "It makes me feel at ease. You make me feel beautiful."

"Y-You are beautiful, you don't need my help for that!" Was that too forward of her part? Tsubomi hoped not, but Itsuki's face became so red that Tsubomi had to look away so that her own cheeks wouldn't catch fire as well.

"Is that how you really feel, Tsubomi?"

Slowly, Tsubomi turned her face towards Itsuki again, hoping that if she took a deep breath and thought before speaking she wouldn't be flustered, and would actually be able to express all her thoughts without stuttering and tripping on her own words.

She failed miserably, and all she managed was a meek nod.

"I'm so glad," she beamed. "I… That was all I ever wanted, you know? If you think that, then it doesn't matter what anyone else might think. I'm not used to this, you know? To let my hair grow, to wear all those pretty clothes I always wanted to. Sometimes I look at myself and think that I'm wrong. That I'm like a child playing dress-up."

"Why would you think that?" Tsubomi would yell, but the words came out hushed, no more than a sad sigh. "You are…" _You are the sun._ "You are so beautiful."

"I only think that until I see you," Itsuki said, and Tsubomi simply could not understand how she had not just exploded right there and then. "The way you look at me, well, you're not really hiding it, you know?"

She shrank against a mirror, almost knocking it aside, and hid her face in her hands. This was too embarrassing, Itsuki was going to laugh at her, say she was silly and-

Tsubomi felt the warmth of the sun on her hands. Softly, Itsuki pulled them away from her face, and took a long look at Tsubomi. She was smiling. Shining.

"If you're too flustered to say it, that's okay. I can say it for you. I feel the same way about you. You are beautiful, Tsubomi. And kind, understanding, and gentle, which I think is even more important. I knew you loved me, and I'm sure you knew I loved you too. Am I right?"

"Sometimes I thought you might," Tsubomi admitted. "But I could never be sure. I didn't want to be wrong."

"You wouldn't be. It's the truth," she said, and cupped Tsubomi's cheek with a hand, turning her from cherry blossom into rose.

"You really are…" _Warm like the sun_. "So warm…"

Itsuki said nothing. She just touched her with the other hand, running her fingers across Tsubomi's face, little talons of fire caressing her, never burning, only making her feel a warmness that she always longed for. In the end Itsuki's fingers lingered on her lips. It took all of Tsubomi's conviction not to shy away, and she did her best. She rose her own hand so that she too could feel Itsuki.

When she touched her, Itsuki did not flinch.

"I really am happy that you find me beautiful," said Itsuki. _And how could I not?_ "I've always wanted that. I've always admired you," now she was the one who turned scarlet. "Can I say something embarrassing?"

Tsubomi nodded. Nothing Itsuki said could ever be embarrassing.

"Since I saw you, I've always thought you had the prettiest hair," she said, reaching out to it. Tsubomi wore it untied tonight, but when Itsuki held it on her hands, she divided it into two long strands. "The prettiest pigtails… Or should I call them twintails? I'm trying to learn, but I still don't have much of a clue about this stuff. Ah, well…" She let go of her hair. "When I saw it, I wanted it. I wished I could have hair as cute as yours. I guess that's silly of me, but-"

"Not silly," she would never allow Itsuki to call herself silly for that.

"When I became Sunshine, my hair was so similar to yours. When I transformed, I never felt so pretty. I didn't even realize it back then, but now I wonder if Sunshine looks like that because of how much I admired you."

"Itsuki…"

"I know I don't need to be like you now!" She was quick to say. "I know I can look pretty in my own way now. I know I don't even need to be Sunshine to feel happy about myself. I know all those things now. And it's all thanks to you, to Erika, to Yuri, to Nanami, to Naomi, to Rumiko… But mostly you."

Tsubomi had never even imagined hearing something like that. She didn't even know how to respond without making a fool of herself, so she said nothing. This was all she ever wanted to hear, and she never even knew it. To be loved- No, to be admired like that by the sun when she was a mere flower… _I am just a flower,_ she had told herself again and again until she believed it, _and Itsuki is the sun._ All she could do was bloom and hope the sun would find it beautiful. It was all she had, it was the only gift a flower could give to the sun. She had never thought it could mean so much to Itsuki.

"Your hair," Tsubomi said awkwardly. "I want to braid it," she said, and Itsuki nodded. Itsuki turned back, and Tsubomi looked at the mirror and saw she close her eyes, so calm.

Itsuki just seemed so peaceful that Tsubomi herself felt relaxed, and she felt as if she didn't have to say anything right now. She just brushed Itsuki's hair once again, letting loose a few strands of hair that fell on the floor. She didn't have much to work with, but Tsubomi did the best she could, and weaved some tiny braids in a ring around her head. _Almost a crown_ , she thought. Whenever Itsuki looked upon the mirror and smiled, it felt like a small triumph to Tsubomi. She kept going, and sometimes she could feel Itsuki's fingers on her arms, on her legs, on her face, but they never said a thing. They stood there in pleasant silence, the beautiful sun and her precious blossom.

Until that silence was broken by Erika kicking the door open. She carried a large, heavy box. Her face was hidden behind it, but her arms were shaking and straining from the weight. _Watch where you're going_ , Tsubomi was about to say, but then Erika stepped on a small hair clip, and tripped. She fell with her face on the floor, but never let go of the box, hanging on to it like it was more precious than her own life.

"Who left that thing there?" She complained, and Tsubomi's unimpressed stare was a succinct enough answer. "Oh."

"What is it that you're carrying?" Asked Tsubomi. Erika had said that she had something important to get, she said that it was a crucial mission that would test her wits and subterfuge. The box was certainly big, but it was just colored a plain blue, and did not look remarkable at all.

"Behold," she said in her most pompous voice, "a treasure beyond price! Wars have been waged to lay claim on this box! People would betray their own siblings just to take a peek at it! Now," she twirled her fingers, "look, and consider yourselves lucky to have the privilege of gazing upon Momoka's collection of nail polish."

"Did you steal it from her?" Tsubomi asked.

"To be honest, yeah," Erika said, grinning as she always did. "It's fine, though. She's hanging out with Yuri. She won't be back for a while. Besides, it's just nail polish. If I tried to take her makeup box, though," she shivered. "I don't even wanna imagine what she'd do to me."

She opened the box, and Tsubomi had to admit that Erika wasn't lying. It really was a treasure. There were colors in that Tsubomi had never heard of. What the heck was incarnadine? Erika found her way quickly, and picked up a light shade of blue. So imaginative. Tsubomi looked at all the colors, and she could not decide. They were all so pretty…

"Which one do you want, Itsuki?" Tsubomi asked. Maybe they could match.

"I'm… Not sure."

"Yellow?" Itsuki shook her head.

"It's pretty, but I'm a bit tired of it. Maybe red? Purple? What do you think?"

"I think whatever you decide is good. It's your choice, after all."

With a soft "hm-hm" Itsuki examined the labels closely , trying to decide. Tsubomi looked as well. Sweetwine. Ribbon-red. Heartbeat. Rose's kiss. Their differences were all very subtle, but Tsubomi was certain that Momoka could tell them all apart. Maybe Erika could, too. She always had a nice eye for colors. Tsubomi hoped that one day she could be the same.

Itsuki didn't seem any closer to deciding. The colors overwhelmed her as well. She seemed torn between two shades of red. Her face was uncertain, too. She didn't seem too comfortable.

"Have you ever done this?"

"I tried, once," said Itsuki. She was just the cutest thing when she was blushing. "For the fashion show. I borrowed some from Naomi. It… It didn't go so well. Some of it smeared on my fingers."

"Really?"

"D-Don't look at me like that!" She said, and giggled. "It was my first time, and I was nervous. I had never been dressed like that around so many people. I didn't want to look like I was uncomfortable. I didn't want to look like I didn't belong there."

"You looked marvellous. You had no reason to fear."

"I know it now. I didn't know it then. Anyways, I'd like to ask you for help on this as well," she said. Itsuki had a lot of pride, but also felt no shame in learning. "You said whatever color is fine, but I can't seem to decide."

"Ah, well," Tsubomi thought of a way to say it. She herself wasn't too sure of what to pick. "I think," she began, looking at all the colors, then at Itsuki, "that you should just pick the first color that catches your eye. A color that seems to jump at you. A color that you find pretty. One that you admire," she said, then put her hand in the box, and took it off in a single second, before she could even think. Between her fingers was a small bottle of yellow polish. On its label was the picture of a sunflower.

"Well, aren't you smooth?" Itsuki asked, laughing.

"I-I swear it wasn't on purpose!" Itsuki still looked unconvinced. "It wasn't, really!"

"Alright, alright. A color I admire? Well, that'll have to pink. I wonder if there's a shade there that's named cherry blossom."

"There has to be," Tsubomi shrugged. "There are like twenty different kinds of pink there."

"But there's only one I care about," she said, and Tsubomi felt that warmth again.

"And you say I'm the smooth one."

"Another thing I learned from you," Itsuki got up, and held out her hand to Tsubomi. Tsubomi held on tight, and stood up, reaching towards to the sun she loved so much.

They sat next to each other on Erika's messy bed, tossing some pillows aside. For the longest time, she refused to let go of Itsuki's hand. They twined their fingers together until Tsubomi felt nothing but a peaceful warmth.

In this warmth she could bloom.


End file.
